(no subject)

[dr_daniel_jackson]

It was three days after Daniel had been admitted to the hospital and Dr. Stevens had said he could be released that morning. He looked over at the cot where Methos lay sleeping and smiled to himself. The man had not once left his side since his arrival. It gave Daniel hope that maybe they'd work things out again. He thought of where they might go because Daniel didn't think he could go back to his apartment given that Methos had killed Jack there. He'd actually been looking to buy a house up in the mountains and wondered if he could convince Methos to stay with him there if he did so...

He was brought out of his thoughts as the door to his room opened and Dr. Stevens walked in, holding all of the paperwork that needed to be signed before Daniel could leave. The doctor glanced over at Methos and then at Daniel.

"Shall I wake him or did you want to do that?"

Comments

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

Daniel had his bags in the trunk of the car and was sitting in the passengers seat, waiting quietly for Methos.

When he saw his lover he again looked away almost shyly from him.

"Where... where are we going?" he asked quietly.

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

"No idea." Methos answered honestly, as he pulled out of the driveway, "We can stay at a hotel tonight, then we'll figure it out in the morning."

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

"Okay," Daniel answered as he turned to stare out the passenger's window. They drove not too long before Daniel pointed out a nice looking hotel.

"We can go there," he said softly. "I've stayed there before. They have a suite that's a nice size. I can charge the room to my off shore account..."

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

He pulled into the hotel, "I'll charge it to my account, I'd feel safer that way."

Methos felt a bit of an awkward silence between them as he parked the car. He stepped out of the car and grabbed a bag of things and went to check in, "I'll be right back."

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

Daniel nodded and waited for Methos to return. When the older man did so, Daniel grabbed his own bags and followed Methos to the suite they would be staying in. Once inside, he set his bags down and walked over to the large picture window, opening the drapes only a little so that he could look outside, hearing Methos move around behind him.

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

He put his things away in silence and then looked to Daniel standing at the window. There was something he'd been meaning to ask since the hospital.

"Daniel?" he asked questioningly, his voice soothing, "Why don't you want to speak to a psychiatrist?"

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

Daniel sighed softly. He knew his lover would want answers.

"Several years ago, I had a problem in which the government doctors decided I had multiple personality disorder and they locked me up in a padded room, wrapped in a restraining coat. No one believed me when I said I was fine. I haven't trusted psychiatrists at all since then."

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

"I've been a psychiatrist... do you trust me?" he wrapped his arms around his waist.

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

"With my life," Daniel whispered softly, letting his hands rest against Methos' arms. "I'm not sure how to talk about what happened," he admitted softly. "I'm afraid of upsetting you... afraid that you will see me as something fragile and weak and that you will not want to stay. My self confidence is shot right now... and my sanity is just hanging by a thread. If you hadn't returned when you did..." He trails off, feeling tears fall down his face.

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

He pressed his lips on the back of his head, "You can tell me anything, Daniel. The only people I'll be upset with are the ones that have done this to you. Just... you need to tell someone, Daniel. If you don't feel comfortable telling me... you need to find someone. Or it won't get better... all that pain you're feeling will just remain and fester."

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

Daniel nodded slowly and was quiet for a few more minutes before speaking again.

"The doctor was right... I was tortured. They beat me, burned me with cigarettes... they even used a car battery and cables to try and make me talk and tell them what they wanted to know. When none of those things worked, they began to withhold food and water both. Then it was sleep deprivation. The day you showed up, I knew they'd come back for me and, if I didn't cooperate, they'd finally just kill me..."

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

He pulled him closer, "All this... just to get you to ascend?"

Methos wanted to find every single person that had touched Daniel and make them play with their heads.

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

Daniel nodded, brushing away the tears on his face as he relaxed a little more into his lover's hold.

"I had already decided, before you showed up, that if it started up again, I'd kill myself and not give them anything. I couldn't take the torture for much longer. Then too... you saw how sick I was getting by the time you came..."

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

He nuzzled Daniel's neck, silent for a moment, "I'm so sorry, Daniel... if I could find a way to take it all away, I would."

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

"It's not your fault, Methos. Please... don't apologize. You didn't know. There was no way you could have known. And there's no way to say that it wouldn't have happened even if you'd still been around." he turned in Methos' embrace and pressed his face into the side of his lover's neck, just holding there for the moment, breathing in the scent he remembered and relaxing even a little more.

"All that matters to me is that you're here now..."

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

He still felt at fault, despite Daniel's words. Methos held him tight, still reassuring himself that the younger man was there. His voice was soft and pained, "When I got you to the hospital... I thought... I thought you were going to die."

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

Daniel's hold tightened at those words and he felt fresh tears spilling down his face once more. He didn't say anything but he pulled back and framed Methos' face with his hands and kissed him softly, groaning softly as he realized how much he'd missed just this simple act between them.

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

It didn't seem all that long ago that Methos had been with Daniel in Morocco. A blink of an eye. But as Daniel's lips met his, he realized how much he too had missed the act. And he'd been resigned to the fact that he would never hold or kiss Daniel again. He melted into the kiss, with a soft sigh.

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

Daniel relaxed that last little bit as he realized he wasn't going to be pushed away. He pressed in closer, that kiss becoming a little harder as his hands slid to Methos' waist, just holding there for a moment before slipping beneath the hem of the shirt his lover wore, fingers pressing into heated skin.

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

His tongue roamed Daniel's mouth hungrily, but his touch was tender and loving. Daniel was still recovering. Still hurt. Gently, Methos' hands found the sides of Daniel's face.

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

Daniel groaned softly as he felt that touch against his face and he pressed in a little more, desperate for more of that touch. He pulled back a little, breathing a little harder now than before.

"I've missed your touch," he whispered softly, resting his forehead against his lover's. "Come to bed with me... please... I want more..."

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

Methos ran his thumbs over Daniel's cheeks, brushing away the tears he'd shed moments before. "Daniel, what about your injuries? I don't want to hurt you."

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

"You could never hurt me," Daniel whispered softly. "I swear I'll tell you if anything starts to hurt but I've missed your touch. Two years is a long time to not be touched by the one you love..."

[really-oldguy.livejournal.com]

Oh. But he could. Sometimes he wondered if Daniel realized the full extent of how dangerous Methos was. But, he couldn't deny the man. He wanted this too.

"Okay, but promise me that you'll tell me."

Methos kissed him on the lips, then his chin, then neck, pulling in toward the bed.

[dr-dmjacksonsg1.livejournal.com]

"I promise," Daniel whispered, tilting his head to one side as he followed Methos towards the bed, his hands sliding up beneath his lover's shirt, tugging the shirt upwards as he did so, wanting it off.